Irrevocable
by Croik
Summary: KirihitoPhoenix share an evening 5 years before the start of the GS4. BIG GS4 spoilers. Smut and a little breathplay sort of.


Ace Attorney / Gyakuten Saiban, its characters and settings, are property of Capcom, and are being used here without permission. This fic is rated NC-17 for yaoi content and contains GS4 spoilers.

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**Irrevocable**

Oneshot

Phoenix was accustomed by now to the sensation that he had made a mistake. There were some that had made sense at the time, but not in hindsight. But this one he could not account for even now.

"And where is your daughter this evening?"

"With a friend." Phoenix shifted uncomfortably on the plush sofa he had been guided to. This was his first visit to the home of Kirihito Garyuu, and already he was hoping it was not an event he would be repeating. Everything was rich and bold, but so immaculately arranged that the feeling of warmth dark wood and soft carpet should have evoked was completely lost. It felt forced, like the pleased smile of a well practiced liar.

Kirihito returned from the kitchen with a bottle of champagne, chilled, and two glasses. "Ah, your friends in the mountains." He set them all down on the table and undid the buttons on his suit coat before taking a seat next to him.

It had never been his intention to tell Kirihito about the Feys, but sometimes subjects just came up, and after two years of knowing the man he still had no tangible reason not to trust him. "That's right." He could at least change the subject, though. "I haven't had wine in years."

Kirihito smiled slowly as if he already knew. "A noble sacrifice, for your daughter's sake, I assume?" He poured them each a glass--perfectly, turning the bottle effortlessly. "Is that grape juice of yours really a worthwhile replacement?"

Phoenix made a face. "I happen to like grape juice," he replied as he accepted the wine. Even when he did drink he wasn't much of a champagne person, but just the smell of the alcohol gave his stomach a little tingle even before he'd had any. He took a slow, careful sip. "It's good."

"Thank you." Kirihito relaxed into the sofa, crossing his legs at the knee. He lifted the glass to his nose to breathe in the aroma a moment before drinking. "It was a New Years gift, from my brother. He has good taste in wine, if not in music." Phoenix made a slight face of discontent at the mention of Kyouya, which did not escape his host's notice. "Excuse me. I forget sometimes that you…" His lip twitched faintly in a half formed expression of amusement. "…are not as fond of him as I am."

"That's funny," Phoenix replied dryly. "I didn't think you were all that fond of him, either."

Kirihito's left eyebrow inclined ever so slightly. "What makes you say that?"

"Just a feeling a get from you."

"I see." Kirihito turned his glass slightly so that the champagne tipped back and forth. "How interesting."

Phoenix wasn't sure if he'd offended the man, but he decided to discontinue that line of conversation anyway. "Garyuu…not that I don't appreciate it, but why did you invite me here?" he asked, as he had been trying to ask ever since walking through the door.

"Why not?" He took another slow sip. "We're friends, aren't we? With your daughter away for the night it's a perfect time for a friendly drink."

_Friendly. Right._ Phoenix watched him, waiting for some indication in Kirihito's face or posture that would give away less than innocent intentions. He was not as gifted as Minuki when it came to reading people but he had learned a lot these past years, and it had served him well. But now there was nothing. Kirihito's pale eyes were calm and pleasant, his broad shoulders perfectly relaxed. There was nothing in his manner or voice not to trust.

"So you _are_ trying to get me drunk," Phoenix chuckled. "Well it's going to take more than this, let me tell you. Maybe I haven't had a beer in a while, but I'm no lightweight."

"Of course you're not. There's plenty more where this came from," Kirihito joked along with him.

He held up his glass, and Phoenix obliged him with a toast. "Good to hear."

They both drank, and Phoenix had to admit again…it was damn good champagne. The kind of stuff he never would have been able to afford, and probably wouldn't have thought to buy even if he could. "So. How's business?"

"It's doing very well, thank you." Kirihito reached up with one hand to undo his neck tie as he spoke. "I especially appreciate the consultation you did on our last case. You must have heard already that we got an acquittal."

"Yes, I heard." It hadn't technically been his case, but when Kirihito had outlined the details to him earlier in the week, he knew instantly that the client was innocent. Though he should have known better than to get involved, he couldn't say he regretted it. "Congratulations."

"You ought to be congratulating yourself," Kirihito said modestly. "We might have lost if not for your help, Wright. The client was very grateful." His eyes thinned slightly at their edges. "Maybe I should have you consult on my firm's cases more often."

Phoenix quickly shook his head, despite the tiny flutter in his stomach. "No no, that's all right. I was glad to help, but I'm not a lawyer anymore." He smirked bitterly. "I don't think it'd be good for your business to be associated with me."

Kirihito continued to watch him, even over the lip of his glass as he drank. "You miss it," he declared.

Phoenix's shoulders hitched briefly. "Don't be stupid."

"I saw the way you attacked that case," Kirihito insisted with good humor. "I'd never seen you so intense. Except, of course, for the first time we met. But that was over two years ago."

Phoenix and Kirihito had first met face to face at the hearing in which Phoenix's badge was stripped from him. He didn't remember feeling particularly intense then--resigned, maybe. It was not a feeling worth dwelling on. "I'm not a lawyer anymore," he repeated, hoping that Kirihito would let the subject drop. "I can't go running around the city anymore, digging up clues, solving mysteries. That's not my job. And good riddance."

Phoenix threw his head back as he gulped down the rest of his champagne. He was close to lying, of course--he _had_ been around the city looking for clues. Ever since that first exchange of greetings Kirihito had just brought up, the cogs within Phoenix's mind had sprung to life, turning each hint into place. Had the object of his investigation finally caught on? Was that the real meaning behind this encounter?

Narrowed eyes continued to stare back at him, and each moment that passed in silence made Phoenix more nervous. When Kirihito's hand move it was very slowly, but Phoenix flinched as if it had lunged at him. Realizing that he must have looked plenty suspicious already, he held himself still as his host reached out, pulling off his blue wool hat.

"I don't believe you," Kirihito said calmly. He gave the hat a toss, and it landed with the button face down on the floor a few feet away. Phoenix watched only long enough to see where it ended up before flicking his gaze quickly back to Kirihito. "For a short time, you were one of the best of your field."

His long fingers pulled idly at Phoenix's hair, which was flattened and mussed from being confined in the hat all day. It was unnerving--a man like Kirihito didn't make affectionate gestures. Though Phoenix felt the momentary relief of being rid of the thick wool, the discomfort of Kirihito overstepping usual boundaries was much stronger. "What are you doing?"

Kirihito tugged on a strand of hair behind Phoenix's ear, near the edge of his hairline. "I don't believe that you've given up on regretting the past in this short a time," he continued as if not having heard Phoenix's question. "I know what kind of lawyer you were. And you weren't the kind that gave up as easily as that."

"Stop that."

Phoenix snatched his wrist, tugging the hand away from his scalp. He shouldn't have let Kirihito invite him here. At Borscht, there was security. He could engage with Kirihito personally without tipping his hand. But just being here was putting him on edge, and he knew if he stayed much longer he would end up giving something away. Kirihito would begin to suspect him.

For a short moment Kirihito only stared back at him. There was still humor in his face, and that, at least, was a relief. But then he glanced to the hand on his wrist, and his eyes focused a bit more sharply. He twisted his arm, shaking Phoenix easily and catching his wrist instead. As Phoenix tried to decide whether or not he should try to retreat, Kirihito finished the contents of his glass and set it aside.

"Look at this." He tsked as he pulled Phoenix's hand toward him. "You take such awful care of yourself."

Phoenix blinked at him in confusion. It wasn't until Kirihito began using his fingernails to push back his cuticles that he caught on. He sighed, relaxing once more as he let the man work. "They're just nails."

"A man who cannot take care of his own hygiene sufficiently is not a man at all," Kirihito informed him, almost fatherly in his chiding. "No wonder you can't play the piano very well."

"What?" Phoenix shook his head in disbelief when he realized that Kirihito was being serious. "I can't play because I don't _practice._ My nails have nothing--"

"I ought to give you a full manicure," Kirihito continued. "You've got all sorts of grit under there."

Phoenix sighed, but it wasn't worth arguing with the man. He stretched his free arm, pouring himself a bit more champagne. He figured the alcohol would help him appreciate the situation better. But as he settled again, he couldn't help but notice how intent Kirihito was. The smile that deepened the corners of his lips might have even been sincere. And his hands, moving with such precise attention over Phoenix's own…

"That's enough," Phoenix said abruptly, trying to tug his hand back.

Kirihito wouldn't let him. He tugged back, pushing Phoenix's sleeve up his arm. "You're awfully tense all of a sudden," he said thoughtfully. "Am I making you uncomfortable?" His fingers curled so that their tips pressed into the underside of his wrist; his lips moved slightly as if speaking under his breath.

Phoenix stared at him, baffled. It took him a moment to realize that Kirihito was taking his pulse, and for some reason that caused his heart to beat a bit faster. The light scratch of Kirihito's well-manicured nails against his vein seeped images into his brain of the sudden tearing of flesh and the gushing of blood.

"Ah." Kirihito grinned slowly. "You _are_ nervous."

He pulled Phoenix's hand closer, turning it slightly and lowering his head. Phoenix flinched, childishly convinced that he was about to get bitten and his fluids sucked out of him. But then Kirihito only hummed softly, and pressed a soft kiss to the inside of his palm. Confused and wary, Phoenix shivered beneath the unexpected touch.

"You poor thing," Kirihito chuckled as he lifted his head once more. "You're trembling."

Phoenix swallowed hard. "You're acting pretty strangely tonight," he murmured. "Maybe the wine is getting to you. Were you drinking before I got here?"

Kirihito laughed, the deep sound of his voice filling the room. "Are you scared of me, Wright?"

Phoenix managed a thin smirk. "You _are_ a little intimidating sometimes," he teased.

He gave his hand another tug, intending to free himself, but Kirihito's grip abruptly tightened, keeping him captive. Their eyes met, for a moment reflecting seriousness, and then they both broke the tension with twin grins.

"I like you," Kirihito declared. "I'm glad you accepted my invitation tonight."

"Me, too," Phoenix replied, fighting hard to keep any hint of sarcasm out of his voice. "Otherwise I'd be home alone, watching old Steel Samurai reruns or something." He took another gulp of his champagne and finally set it aside for good. Kirihito was up to something, and he ought to be sober for it.

Kirihito made a quiet sound of disgust at the back of his throat. "You and those children's shows."

"They're not that bad…."

He trailed off when Kirihito lifted his hand again. He didn't tense as badly this time, expecting more uncommonly playful teasing, but then Kirihito surprised him again: he bit him, just as Phoenix had foolishly imagined only a moment ago. Phoenix froze in alarm as the man's wet tongue slid across the inside of his wrist, followed by the scrape of teeth. His heart began to pound all over again. "Stop--"

"I'm just having some fun," Kirihito assured. He blew across the dampness on Phoenix's skin, sending goose bumps up the length of his arm. "You're so charming when you're nervous."

They were already seated rather close--close enough that Kirihito only had to stretch his arm to twist his long fingers in the front of Phoenix's sweatshirt. With his other hand still tight around Phoenix's wrist, he began to reel him in. "I'm sure," he drawled, "that fine alcohol isn't the only thing you've gone without these last few years."

Phoenix tasted real fear at the back of his throat now. His mind whirled, stunned by the sudden realization of his own helplessness. He had come here thinking he could play Kirihito as well as the man played everyone else--that he could bluff past that false smile of his and find something truthful. Something he could use. But Kirihito held every advantage over him, had been in control all along. And they were nearly nose to nose before he could begin to think of how to react.

Kirihito smiled, closing his eyes briefly as he tipped his head to the side. "Would you?"

Phoenix stared blankly back, and it wasn't until the man scrunched his nose that he caught on. His free hand was shaking as he slowly lifted it.

_Bash him in the head! _a voice yelled from the back of his mind. _He's not looking. Just grab the bottle and do it!_

Phoenix shuddered, and with a gulp he plucked the glasses off Kirihito's face. As he reached to set them on the table, his knuckles brushed against the cool glass of the champagne bottle.

_But what good would that do?_ Phoenix took in a deep breath to calm himself. _It's your own fault you're in this situation. You're the one that wanted to learn more about him. Damn it, not like this, but_--

Kirihito opened his eyes once more, though only to half. "Thank you."

He finally released Phoenix's wrist, but by the time Phoenix was able to press both hands to Kirihito's chest, the man already had him by the throat. Half senseless with fright, he could only hold himself still as Kirihito leaned in to his mouth.

The kiss was unexpectedly tender. Kirihito's lips were full and soft, and unlike all his strange teasing that evening they moved against Phoenix's with gentle, unobtrusive romance. It had to have been false sincerity--a man like Kirihito did not give sweet kisses. But it was certainly the most beautiful lie Phoenix had ever been offered.

Phoenix squeezed his eyes shut. He gave Kirihito no response until after his lips were his own again. "I don't understand you," he said in little more than a whisper. "Not at all."

Kirihito's quiet exhale of amusement brushed against his chin. "You don't have to."

He kissed him again with the same slow affection, lifting his other hand to join the first in delicately cupping Phoenix's jaw. His care was terrifying. Phoenix's hands balled to fists as he fought against his own panic. _Can I let him do this?_ That question rattled back and forth through his otherwise stricken mind, free from the bounds of reason. His lips tingled as Kirihito's tongue brushed lightly against them.

"Stay with me tonight," Kirihito invited in a breathy murmur. His thumbs pressed gently into Phoenix's furrowed brow, smoothing the wrinkles away.

"I can't," Phoenix replied quickly. He felt as if his throat were throbbing, his pulse was so racing so hard.

"Yes you can." Kirihito's nails tickled his temple and cheeks. "Stay with me, Phoenix. I'm lonely, too."

His words were startling. Untrustworthy, but compelling. Phoenix took in a shaky breath, his hands tense against Kirihito's chest. _You admitted yourself there's no concrete reason not to trust him_, he thought vaguely, his mind swayed by each feathered touch._ And you have nothing to lose._

Phoenix licked his lips. "Oka--"

Kirihito smothered him in another kiss, more passionate than the last. His fingers continued to caress Phoenix's face and neck, even sliding through his hair, scratching his scalp with long fingernails. At long last Phoenix kissed him back. Not wanting to be completely overwhelmed, he urged Kirihito's mouth open, pressing his tongue boldly past supple lips. Kirihito was very willing to oblige him, sucking gently on the exploring intruder. And when Phoenix dared to invite him closer still by wrapping his arms around him, Kirihito all but melted.

_This is insane._

Kirihito pulled back, but he didn't release Phoenix's neck as he carefully climbed off the sofa. Phoenix had no choice but to follow. "Let's do this properly," Kirihito said quietly. He hummed as if very pleased with himself. "But you might have to lead the way. I'm quite helpless without my glasses."

"I don't know my way around your house," Phoenix protested. They were even within reach, sitting there on the table….

"Up the stairs, first room on the left." Kirihito slid his hand down to Phoenix's and gave it a squeeze. "I trust you."

Whatever claims Kirihito made about his sight, his eyes were focused very sharply on his guest, almost penetrating in their gaze. Phoenix had seen his fair share of stare down techniques, but he had to admit, Kirihito's calm smile was especially effective. Too effective for him to really believe it was marked with deception. On this occasion, at least.

"All right…." Phoenix took a deep breath, and tightened his hand around Kirihito's as he turned to lead them from the living room. The staircase was slightly curved and easy to find. It was bizarre, walking hand in hand the entire way up to the second floor like a pair of children.

Kirihito's bedroom was decorated with the same lush warmth as the rest of his house, with thick violet curtains and a king sized bed with a tall, wooden headboard. Phoenix reached for the lights, but Kirihito stopped him, even though it was nearly pitch black without them. Instead, Phoenix was pulled around for another kiss, deep and almost hungry.

Phoenix quickly decided he liked it better with the lights off anyway. With only a faint moonlight gleam coming in through a gap in the curtains it was almost impossible to determine the identity of his partner. Kirihito was being so unexpectedly affectionate that it might as well have been another man entirely. The more Phoenix was kissed, the more he shivered beneath soft fingers alighting on his jaw and neck, the more he came to wonder if this was a perfect opportunity after all. It was possible that neither of them really liked the other. It was _certain_ they did not trust each other. But in the dark, sharing their lips and tongues like ready teenagers, they were perpetuating a charade that was worth keeping alive, if only for one lonely night.

Kirihito slipped out of his suit coat, letting it fall to the floor. Phoenix's gray sweatshirt followed it a moment later, and then the T-shirt he wore beneath. Getting Kirihito out of his dress shirt was a bit trickier, as it required undoing his cuffs as well. By then Phoenix was feeling almost dizzy, surprised with himself by the tremors of honest pleasure Kirihito's attention was spreading through him. It was almost frightening to think he was even capable of enjoying this. But the flutter in his chest and the tension in his groin were proof enough that his body and his reason were not as well connected as he would have liked.

Kirihito at least freed himself from his shirt, and he quickly pulled Phoenix back to him. Free from half his attire, Phoenix could feel now the shapes of well defined muscles beneath Kirihito's soft and well-pampered skin, proof of the strength he had displayed earlier. When he found himself pressed tightly against a toned chest and abdomen he forgave himself momentarily for his weak will. It would take a much stronger man than him to feel no desire, wrapped up in the warm, unrelenting arms that had him now.

Teeth scraped his bottom lip, hard enough to hurt but not to draw blood. Phoenix hummed in protest. Whether he had planned it all along or was simply getting caught up in the fervor, Kirihito's softness was gradually peeling away. His breath began pant between each hurried, increasingly harsh kiss, and soon even his embrace was vaguely clinging.

This was more like the lover Phoenix would have expected Kirihito to be; impatient, and selfish. It comforted him in a strange way to know he hadn't been entirely wrong in his judgments. With a sudden, renewed confidence Phoenix pressed forward, using what leverage he had to back Kirihito into the closest wall. If Kirihito's composure was fracturing, there was still a chance for him to take control.

Curved fingernails bit hard into the backs of Phoenix's shoulders when they hit, and Kirihito's laughter, so deep in the otherwise quite room, gave him chills. Pale silver light highlighted Kirihito's tall cheek bones and raised eyebrows. "You're finally getting into it."

Phoenix swallowed hard. There was a sharpness in the man's tone that hadn't been present earlier. It made Phoenix's heart pound anew as he kissed Kirihito hard on the mouth. He wanted to leave bruises. _There's the real you,_ he gloated within his own mind. The rush of adrenaline, fueled by his accomplishment, was exhilarating. _I was right about you after all. Someday soon…everyone will see it, too._

"Garyuu…" Phoenix hissed when Kirihito's biting kisses found his throat. "Is _this_ why you invited me over tonight…?"

"In a way," Kirihito replied evasively. He arched his back, rubbing his hips against his partner's. "Isn't this what you want?"

Phoenix closed his eyes, his lips parting as Kirihito's mouth and hands softened once more. Every movement of Kirihito's was carefully planned, every touch perfectly placed. Even the tiny murmur of pleasure that escaped him when Phoenix leaned into him sounded well rehearsed. It was all part of the game they were already playing. Kirihito was observing and testing him like he had every encounter they'd shared.

It should have ended there. But despite his better sense, Phoenix felt himself more attracted to the man than ever. It was just sex. All he was being offered was a few short minutes of passion without risk of heartbreak or attachment. Too many times before he had given his love freely, and found only betrayal. What risk was there of that here, when he _already_ knew Kirihito had a blade poised at his back?

Petty excuses for a lust-driven mind.

"Garyuu." Phoenix opened his eyes once more, though the room was barely less indistinguishable that way. "I know what you are," he said suddenly. In a movement he had been waiting to do for years, he ran his fingers through the spiral of Kirihito's long hair, ruining the already loosening curls. "Just for tonight…let's not pretend."

Kirihito went very still around him; even his slow breath ceased to tickle Phoenix's whiskers. In the dark, Phoenix could just barely make out the shape his bottom lip held between his teeth. The silence was eerie, but brief, and then Kirihito shook his head to free his hair. He gave quiet, almost choking laugh. "All right…."

They met once more, and it took them only a short time to work up their momentum. Despite their agreement to forego their deceptions, Kirihito did not resort immediately to biting again, as Phoenix had assumed he might. His mouth was heavy, and his fingers still too severe in their grip of Phoenix's shoulders, but it was a subdued kind of violence. It was almost as if Kirihito himself couldn't decide which form of passion he honestly wanted to express.

At long last they pulled away from the wall. Kirihito required no guidance this time as he stepped back to the bed, drawing Phoenix quick after. "So…." In another display of strength he pushed Phoenix hastily onto his back and crawled over him. "You think you 'know what I am'."

Phoenix sighed quietly as he relaxed onto his back. The mattress was stiff, but oddly welcoming. "Maybe I do."

Kirihito scooted down his companion's body to slowly undo the tie on his sweatpants. "Even though earlier you said…you didn't understand me. 'Not at all'."

"They're not the same thing," Phoenix tried to reason. "Do you find that funny? You're smiling."

"Maybe I do," Kirihito quoted smugly. He took hold of the waistbands of Phoenix's pants and boxers, drawing them down. The light scratching of Kirihito's nails against his thighs was oddly erotic. Once he'd removed Phoenix's clothing, along with what remained of his own, he all but slithered back up his body for a kiss. "Because _I_ know _you_ very well."

Phoenix's sank a little deeper into the mattress with Kirihito's hands braced on his chest. He had never considered himself a particularly difficult person to know, but hearing Kirihito say it like that made it sound like an accomplishment. "Oh…?" He couldn't help his curiosity.

"Yes..." Kirihito purred. He nibbled lightly at Phoenix's ear. "Maybe better than you do."

Phoenix rubbed the man's ribs and back, appreciating his smooth skin. "You sound like you're starting to act again," he called him out.

Kirihito tensed, and this time he did bite--hard, into the crook of Phoenix's shoulder. Phoenix hissed but held himself still until he was let go. "Very well," Kirihito murmured. He licked the indentations his teeth had caused. "Maybe it's better if I say nothing at all."

He spread a line of hot, moist kisses along Phoenix's collar bone, then down his sternum. He shifted lower, and the friction of bare skin made Phoenix squirm on the bed anxiously. As Kirihito positioned himself between his partner's thighs and continued, it suddenly occurred to Phoenix that he shouldn't let those devious teeth any further south than they already were. He had been too easy already in giving the other any power over him. But as Kirihito's mouth reached below his navel, he suddenly found that the thought of the risk he was taking was only exciting him more. Every gentle touch of ivory to his skin made his heart pound, and his groin throbbed in anxious anticipation. It was the thrill of uncertainty he had lately learned to appreciate as a gambler.

Kirihito wrapped his arm around Phoenix left thigh, helping to hold him still as he slowly relaxed his jaw. Phoenix pushed himself up on his elbows to properly watch, his breath held, as Kirihito wrapped his full lips around the tip of his straining erection. He held himself very still, too afraid to enjoy it yet for fear of the pain that might follow.

And Kirihito played it up, too. Aware of Phoenix's apprehension he held himself just as still, his eyes intense and almost warning. At long last he rubbed the tip of his tongue very gently across Phoenix's head.

Despite his efforts, Phoenix could not suppress a tiny gasp as shivers ran through his tense body. It must have been enough to please Kirihito; he gave up his teasing, and curled his lips deliberately over his teeth as he began to suck him in a slow, steady rhythm.

Phoenix shuddered. The hot, wet velvet of Kirihito's mouth was incredible, rendering him momentarily breathless. He spread his knees wider and carefully angled his hips so he could better witness what was being done to him. He didn't think anything could capture his attention more absolutely than the sight of his own stiff flesh enjoying such attention, until Kirihito began to take him in deeper. Bit by bit more of him disappeared past those soft, curled lips, to be welcomed by the slow, muscular caress of a clever tongue.

It was mind expanding. When Phoenix's breath finally returned to him it was in thick groans, the only articulation he was capable of making. His hands dug into the mattress as he watched with fevered fascination; he was certain he could feel his already engorged flesh swell within the pressure of so much heat. When Kirihito had sucked nearly his entire length into his mouth and throat it became almost unbearable, and Phoenix flopped onto his back once more with a low, desperate moan. He was being assaulted by too much sensation: his toes, cramped from being curled too tightly; the brush of long, silky hair against his hips and thighs; but of course most of all the steady pulse of lust Kirihito was drawing through his veins that left him quivering on the bed sheets.

Kirihito shifted his weight slightly, and without more warning than that Phoenix felt a pair of fingers slide along the cleft of his ass and press deftly into him. The unexpected--but definitely not unwelcome--stimulus ruined whatever self control he had been trying retain. He shuddered and cried out sharply as his climax overwhelmed him in waves unlike anything he'd felt in a long time. Despite the twitching of his hips Kirihito remained perfectly still, continuing the coaxing of his tongue until Phoenix was completely spent and panting in exhaustion.

At long last Kirihito released him. His eyes were narrowed in concentration as he straightened upright, and after some effort to compose himself he licked his lips. He hummed softly in approval.

"Shit…." Phoenix wiped the sweat from his brow, still a bit breathless. As he let his hand fall to his chest he remembered that Kirihito's fingers were still inside him, and when he tried to speak properly they started to move. Even their very subtle, circular motion was too much for his weary, raw body, and he tried to squirm back with a tiny murmur.

Kirihito chuckled, drawing Phoenix's attention to his face. Still drunk on euphoria, all Phoenix could make out of Kirihito's golden features was that he was gorgeous. With his blonde hair hanging close to his cheeks and trailing down his chest, his already tanned skin flush with excitement, he resembled deity more than man. "You're not done already, are you?" he purred.

"Wait…" Phoenix's heels dug into the mattress, but he couldn't get any strength into his wobbly legs. When those teasing fingers crept deeper, rubbing and stretching, his chin tipped back with a thin whimper. "Gimme…a few minutes."

"…No." Kirihito grinned, baring teeth. "I don't think I will."

His other hand wrapped around Phoenix's by now softened member, giving it a few swift strokes. Phoenix groaned, trying to push at Kirihito with his hands and knees, but when those long fingers began to slide in and out of him in a steady, familiar motion, his protests quickly began to weaken. If only Kirihito would reach a bit further still, he could grant his partner the pleasure he suddenly desired more than anything.

"I…I can't," Phoenix gasped, pawing at Kirihito's forearms.

"Yes you can." He gave Phoenix a squeeze, and the rubbing of his thumb along the underside of Phoenix's most sensitive organ drew unexpected heat back into his drained body. "You're already getting hard."

As impossible as it seemed, it was true. Phoenix whimpered again as he felt fresh excitement beginning to curl in his stomach. He didn't have time to dwell on his amazement. As soon as he gave himself over to Kirihito's continued attention, both hands were withdrawn to instead take him firmly by the hips. Phoenix took a deep breath to ready himself, and it was a good thing he did--Kirihito's first thrust was without restraint, and Phoenix cried out again as he was penetrated.

"G…Garyuu…" Phoenix's eyes watered; despite all their tight embraces he hadn't gotten a good look or feel of his partner, and was unprepared for his very impressive girth. But when Kirihito began to move, pumping a hard rhythm against his hips, it nearly drove him senseless with delight. He cursed hoarsely as Kirihito easily struck his aching center again and again. He bent his knees higher and urged Kirihito on. "F-Faster…"

Kirihito hissed, and he leaned forward suddenly to snap his hand around Phoenix's throat. The clench of his nails sent Phoenix's pulse racing dangerously. He grabbed Kirihito's wrist, but it was difficult to concentrate on anything with the man rocking so perfectly into him. His vision swam. Every muscle and tendon attached to his bones was quivering with lust and burning with exhaustion, made only more potent by the sudden fear that he could barely draw in each gasping breath.

Somewhere in the heavy space above Kirihito was moaning loudly. He sped up, until the mattress creaked and the tall wooden headboard beat against the wall in a pounding, percussive rhythm. For a moment it stopped feeling real. Phoenix told himself, with a startling clarity, that it wasn't possible to experience passion this heated and perilous. Only something awful could follow.

Again Phoenix reached a fiery orgasm, drawn out ridiculously long by the last of Kirihito's heavy thrusts. The lack of air made his lungs ache and his body feel weightless, as if he might have left it in favor of some greater ecstasy mere flesh wasn't capable of enjoying. His fingers and toes trembled with cold.

Phoenix's throat was released, and he drew in a sharp breath. His temples pounded as blood rushed through his arteries. For nearly full minutes he could only gasp for breath as his pulse attempted to slow, his muscles still tight around the yet buried Kirihito.

Kirihito withdrew, and with a quiet sigh stretched out at Phoenix's side. They didn't touch in any way that was intentional. They didn't even attempt to speak until both had calmed, and their heartbeats were even. Phoenix glanced over. He wasn't sure what it was he felt, watching Kirihito's closed eyes and quivering, parted lips. Laid out on his stomach Kirihito had one hand curled close to his face, making him appear oddly childlike. For better or worse, it seemed that he had held up their agreement to act in all honesty.

Phoenix reached out to touch a strand of blond hair. The contact stirred Kirihito's eyelids open once more, and they regarded each other in silence. Kirihito licked his lips. "Do you still think you know me?" he asked coldly.

Phoenix let his hand fall. "No," he admitted. He closed his eyes, very near passing straight out at that point. "I don't know you at all."

The mattress shifted as Kirihito scooted closer, leaning against Phoenix's shoulder. Their sweat met and mingled as it sank into the sheets. "I know you," Kirihito whispered. His voice was so soft, so distant, Phoenix almost thought he was imagining it, like some kind of fever dream. "I know…that you would want to forgive me, if I asked you to."

Phoenix's brow wrinkled, trying to achieve proper coherency despite his fatigue. "What…?"

"You don't like what you're doing," Kirihito continued. "Deep down. You don't want to do this." He played his fingers lightly over Phoenix's chest. "So don't. Let it go…."

Phoenix swallowed hard, not letting himself dwell on what truth might be in those words. "Garyuu," he tried for a third time. "Why did you invite me here tonight…?"

Kirihito fell still and silent, and just when Phoenix was expecting a jab of teeth, he felt instead smooth fingers curling over his chest.

"Because," Kirihito hissed against his ear. "I want you to hate yourself. As much as I do."

Kirihito lifted his clenched first, and drove a knife into his heart.

Phoenix bolted upright. Silk sheets pulled at his limbs, and he flailed weakly to free himself, breathing hard and eyes wide. When he reached for his chest and found it damp he went tight with horror. But there wasn't any pain, or numbness either, and it took entirely too long for him to realize the moisture was only his own sweat.

Gulping, Phoenix twisted back and forth, still fearful. He was in bed, alone. At once he was struck with a profound sense of relief--it had been a dream. The strangest, most erotic dream he'd ever had, but still, pure fantasy.

The shower was running. His still clouded mind assumed it was Minuki, home early, and he swung his legs off the side of the bed intending to go call a greeting to her. But the moment he pushed off the mattress his knees wobbled and his hips made a stinging complaint. He grabbed for the headboard to avoid toppling back onto the bed completely.

_It wasn't a dream._ Phoenix glanced swiftly around, trying to adjust to the dim lighting. A slight illumination was coming from under a door on the far wall, and from it he was able to identify the broad, king sized bed that wouldn't have even fit in his poor apartment. The sheets were dark and felt…expensive. More importantly, he couldn't remember feeling so sore since being hospitalized for falling down a ravine. He rubbed his back as everything came back to him.

_I must have fallen asleep. Or passed out._ Phoenix licked his lips as he followed the mattress to its other end, feeling around with his outstretched feet for his boxers and pants. _Then we really did it after all._ The relief he had latched onto quickly faded and was replaced with cold incredulity…and shame. _I can't believe I really did that. I wasn't drunk, was I?_ Grimacing against pain and disgust, he began to dress himself. _How am I going to make it home like this?_

The sound of the shower stopped, and Phoenix muttered a curse as he finished pulling his pants over his hips. He had no choice but to leave the support of the bed, darting to the center of the room for his discarded shirt and hoodie. He was just straightening up from having retrieved them when the bathroom door swung open.

Kirihito smiled at him. He was dressed in a thick, rose-red bathrobe, looking quite smug. "Oh, you're awake. Are you leaving?"

"Yes…" Phoenix took a deep breath, trying to hide his anxiety with ease. "Yeah, I should get back. In case Minuki calls."

"Of course. I figured you might." Kirihito stepped closer, squinting a little as he reached for and clasped Phoenix's shoulder. The squeeze reminded Phoenix of tooth-shaped bruises there, along with the half-moon rivets sharp nails had dug into his neck and back. "I've already called you a cab."

"Thank you…" Phoenix stared at him, disoriented.

The hand on his shoulder slithered up to Phoenix's neck, two fingers pressing against the pulse of his jugular. Even knowing what he was up to Phoenix had no way of keeping his heart from beating a little faster. The events of that night were still imprinted on his body and in his mind, and every touch and glance from Kirihito threatened to revive each burning sensation.

"You're still nervous," Kirihito observed with a smirk.

Phoenix took a deep breath and urged the hand away from him. He was half afraid Kirihito wouldn't allow it, but this time he gave no resistance to being prodded. "I'm exhausted," he corrected, and even managed a slight grin of his own. "You could have gone a little easier on me."

"Why would I?" Kirihito tilted his chin up slightly. "You told me not to pretend."

"I guess you're right." Phoenix shook his head; he still felt dizzy, and he didn't trust himself to remain in Kirihito's presence any longer. "Thanks for inviting me over tonight," he said with determination. It was time to make his escape. "I had…a great time."

Kirihito nodded. "We should do it again sometime."

"No." Phoenix answered too quickly, and tried to cover it with nervous laughter. "I don't think I'd survive."

They chuckled with faked humor, and Kirihito took Phoenix's hand once more as he led him to the bedroom door. "Well good night, Wright. I trust we're still having dinner, two weeks from now? Like always?"

"Yeah, sure." Phoenix stepped quickly out of the room, and was relieved when Kirihito remained in the doorway. "I'll…call you."

"Excellent. Have a safe trip home."

"Good night…"

Phoenix took a few backwards steps, still a little anxious about having to turn his back when Kirihito was watching him with such close attention. Kirihito must have noticed his hesitation, and after a moment it seemed his patience suddenly wore thin. He took his own step back, still smiling as he closed the bedroom door with a heavy slam.

Phoenix jumped, and hissed more vulgarities as he turned to hurry down the stairs. He shoved the rest of his clothes on, retrieved his hat and sandals, and was at last on his way out of the house entirely. As soon as the door closed behind him, a yellow cab pulled up the driveway.

_I still don't understand him._ Phoenix closed his eyes for a brief moment to regain his composure before walking to greet the driver. _I'm not sure I understand anything._


End file.
